I can almost always be found within the tiny schism between amusement and despair.
I think especially here.
Previously, I viewed this state as inconsistent and uncomfortable. But now, maybe I'm reconsidering that idea. Perhaps, it's the restlessness in my soul that keeps me wedged between these two emotions. Restlessness is not uninteresting. It's actually a pool of overly saturated colors and mellow guitar riffs. Tonight, I looked in the mirror and didn't recognize what I saw there. I thought to myself, what happened to the girl who felt so much and found every thought that entered her head fascinating and original? Even if that wasn't really true, that perspective really turns me on. Somewhere along the way, I threw off my cloak of authenticity and traded it in for something a lot more sober. I wonder if that's something that inevitably happens to people that life really just knocks the shit out of at some point.
If that's true, it makes me cringe. This life is a lot like love. It can cover over the things that you once thought were so important and objective. It dresses them up like a lovely, young person. Happy, blissful even. Like walking on a cloud. Or through a fog.
I think especially here.
Previously, I viewed this state as inconsistent and uncomfortable. But now, maybe I'm reconsidering that idea. Perhaps, it's the restlessness in my soul that keeps me wedged between these two emotions. Restlessness is not uninteresting. It's actually a pool of overly saturated colors and mellow guitar riffs. Tonight, I looked in the mirror and didn't recognize what I saw there. I thought to myself, what happened to the girl who felt so much and found every thought that entered her head fascinating and original? Even if that wasn't really true, that perspective really turns me on. Somewhere along the way, I threw off my cloak of authenticity and traded it in for something a lot more sober. I wonder if that's something that inevitably happens to people that life really just knocks the shit out of at some point.
If that's true, it makes me cringe. This life is a lot like love. It can cover over the things that you once thought were so important and objective. It dresses them up like a lovely, young person. Happy, blissful even. Like walking on a cloud. Or through a fog.
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